How to make sense of it all

Inside the Brain lives a mother and a baby. Baby experiences things like difference and indifference. Mother sits back and says “I hope you will learn the lesson.” Mother knows it is not good for Baby or the brain to learn the same lesson too many times. Mother pleads to teach Baby discipline. Discipline is the first lesson to be learned, and thus Mother keeps the Brain in line. Mother knows that Baby must feel the pain because if Baby never falls, Baby will never learn to walk. To experience extremes is to learn and grow. This is what Baby teaches the Brain. Through the structure and the sorrow, Baby lives a wondrous life. Baby exists within all types of temporary pains. Baby observes the cut on her knee for the first time and is enamored by the brilliant redness of her blood. Baby feels tears on her cheeks for the first time and caresses her tear ducts as if they had created the whole world. Baby gets her heart broken and learns that the hardwood floor in her bedroom melds into soft palms, a cradle to rest her heavy head. Baby must learn her lessons someday, but as all of the mothers and teachers of the world have said before, it is the journey, not the destination. Mother holds all cliches like this within her. They often prove to be soothing to Baby.

The whole point of our time within this life is to learn and then delicately disappear. Sit in your wisdom. Soak up Baby’s blood and tears and honor the goo. Say thank you and let Baby slowly shapeshift to look more and more like Mother.

Mother, to Baby, knows all there is to know about the world. Mother is an amalgamation of all of the words read, the smiles seen, the turning of the leaves that the Brain has ever experienced. This is how Baby should see Mother. But Mother feels fear, too. Mother reads books about how to parent Baby and makes inferences in what Baby should feel. They exist in the same body, after all. Mother chooses to speak about details that make Baby feel good inside. Mother feeds Baby chocolate and lets Baby sleep all day. Mother tells Baby to stay away from Boys and listen to new music, instead. Mother tells Baby her time in her mortal body is precious. Mother is right. But within the Brain, all Mother can do is repeat things that the Mothers in other Brains have told her. Mother finds it hard to see Baby’s heart crack and to soothe her brain with boys and alcohol instead of words and reflection. These things hurt both Mother and Baby, but the Brain knows that love and hatred are the same thing. Mother and Baby wake up and sit on opposite sides of the sofa watching television.

Mother and Baby often share their thoughts with the Brain. The Brain must make sense of Mother and Baby’s actions. The Brain glues the pieces of the story together. It tells Mother when it is time for Bed. It tells Baby “ we have expelled enough tears.” It is exhausting being the Brain. Being the eyes and the lips. Being responsible for the sensations Mother and Baby come to decipher.

Mother and Baby can only speak to each other, so where does that leave us? Mother and Baby tear us apart, and we must do our best to avoid sabotaging their incessant back-and-forth despite the anguish it causes. The Brain must spend time with Mother and with Baby, stroking her hair, collecting bluebells and honey. Mother and Baby require care, like a muscle after exercise. When we sit with our eyes and our brains, say, at a desk or on the floor, we can assign Mother and Baby an object. We can invite them into our realm and put them in the bodies of plastic horses. We can say to the plastic horses that now hold Mother and Baby, “Mother and Baby, please discuss this.” We can say, “Mother and Baby, I need you to hold this thought for me, if just for a moment.” We trust Mother and Baby let each other speak and cry equally. We expect them to be good listeners. They have been given all of the tools to figure everything out. So the only thing we can really do is feed Mother and Baby avocado. We can acknowledge that the things, people, food, and experiences we feed our bodies are all a part of Mother and Baby’s diet. The body is the home of Mother and Baby, and thus it is precious. We must keep their space sacred and quiet, but only when it is meant to be. Mother and Baby love you because they are you. Close your eyes and picture them, side by side on the sofa. And trust may fill the spaces between your understanding

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